I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
