She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
