I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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