I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize