All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
