I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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