Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
