4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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