Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
