Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
