Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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