Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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