I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
