Slut skills are useful in every country.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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