I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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