We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
