If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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