I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
