I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
