oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
