do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
