A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
