Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize