so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
We're too hungover to prance.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize
