Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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