yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
