The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Randomize
