Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
