Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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