I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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