as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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