Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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