Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
