Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
