You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
