In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
