No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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