Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize