He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Randomize
