69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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