Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
