I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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