ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
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