some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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