he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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