Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
