fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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