More tranny stories later!
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
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