super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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