ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
