love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
